Teach on

Today I shoved myself into my teaching pants and went on a job interview. Granted it was an interview for a job that would be very part time and not pay that well, but I definitely still fit in the pants. Barely.

When I decided I wanted to teach, I was making a conscious decision that I would never make much money. I wanted to choose a career that I could be proud of, but that wouldn't force me to make some of those hard decisions about family and career that many women have to make. Well, I guess I was making some decisions. I just made them in college. I wanted a career that I could theoretically leave for a number of years and then glide back into when I was ready. It was a very practical decision for someone who wanted to have a larger than average family and stay home when the kids were small.

Then a funny thing happened. I loved teaching and I was pretty good at it.There is nothing like the sound of a classroom going at full speed. There's an excited buzz in the air as students work on several different things. There is a magical moment when you take a breath and look at a classroom where every student is engaged in learning about something. The first time I had that moment I knew I had made a good choice, not just in practical terms, but in terms of fulfillment and joy. It was hard to leave.

I miss being in the classroom everyday and I miss that buzz. I still get some of the good parts that came with teaching. The way a kid's eyes light up when they finally understand something or the satisfaction you feel when you are reading a story to a kid and they ask questions and keep engaged are things that both parents and teachers get to experience. But teachers get paid.

I hope to have a few job interviews for some very part-time jobs, but I worry it's like a cocaine addict hoping that one small sniff of the rubber cement will suffice. It will have to do for now though. I think I am doing a good job with these little ones, but I do look forward to the day when I have a reason to buy some better fitting teaching pants.